Totally stuffed

Last night I marked 40 exam papers!! Sat down in my study, turned the radio on and got down to business. Decided I'd stop half-way and get some fruit to eat, and then carried on. Finished them and then went for a walk for 45 minutes.

I have decided that my body needs to get used to this exercise idea. It isn't liking it very much at all. I'm all sore. Not fun. But at least I get warm fuzzies knowing that I'm doing something good for me.

Gutted

Good friends rang up last night to tell us they'd lost their baby to miscarriage at 4 months. How do you comfort someone who's heart is breaking and broken when you know the pain they are feeling. There are no words to answer the questions, no phrases to comfort from the pain, no sentences that will give hope.

It's crazy, becuase while I've been there, in losing two babies, it was only at 10 weeks, this was seeing a formed child, not just knowing it was there. I know what not to say - things like, at least you've got your other kids, oh well, wasn't meant to be, or something must have been wrong and this is natures way. We don't care at this point. We just want it to stop hurting!

I will see her this afternoon - I just hope I can hug at least a little of the hurt away.

Something interesting I read

Not sure who wrote this, and I've modified it a bit, but I thought it was interesting and kinda true:

I asked for strength, and was given difficulties to make me strong
I asked for wisdom, and was given problems to solve
I asked for courage, and given dangers to overcome
I asked for love, and was given opportunities to give love to others
I asked for patience, and was given demanding people to serve
I asked for faith, and was led through the darkest valleys to learn to trust
I receive nothing I want, but recieved everything I need
My asking has been answered but I now I need help to accept the answers.

Understanding Men ...

Three words here, actually two. Don't try. Last night was a classic. Actually first of all, I should mention that I love DH to bits, and still do, even though he frustrates me no end sometimes.

Ok, that lovey dovey bit aside - I really don't understand him sometime. Got home last night, DH came in from the farm about 3/4 of an hour after I got home. By then I'd tidied up, and was starting to get dinner ready. He plonked down on the couch, turned the tele on. Now, don't know about you, but after a day with kids, it would be nice to have some intelligent conversation when i get home. Nope, just don't annoy the man in front of the tele. Plunk dinner down in front of him, don't talk while eating as tele is on, then clean up once plate is plonked on coffee table.

Then I thought, oh, maybe he's grouchy at something i've done. Nope, just tired. So, that was fine, I sat there, played with the kittens, tried not to talk (a very hard thing for me). Anyway, after a while he was on the phone, so I went and did some scrapbooking and came back and he was on the phone to his Mum, so I went back and did some more scrapbooking. Finally, because I didn't want to go to bed bymyself, and wasn't that tired, he got off the phone. So into bed, and I wasn't tired, so I'm still trying not to talk, and tossing and turning because it was far to hot - he was like - what's wrong? Never mind - I said, telling him his mood wouldn't help the situation. 'You didn't answer the question.' Ok, so I let is spill - rant, rant, rant. And then - it was all my fault becuase I'm an adult now, and shouldn't need affirmation for things I do. Ok - I officially give up - not even going to try.

He's just lucky my temperature was down again this morning, because no babydancing happened last night and I don't want to miss that window!!! Ok, so I'm crazy!!!

Catching up ...

30^th October 2006

You would not believe this, I was rejoicing this morning because the seniors have exams, and that means that my class teaching time is cut in half. Hm, forgot about a little thing called exam supervision; in a hall with no internet access. So, now I’m sitting in a hall, staring at students, while typing up my blog on Word which I’ll copy across later. These kids look very bored. Ok, bored but busy. And I still have 40 minutes of this to go. I’m bored already!!!

Ok. Let me start with a recount of my weekend. As you may remember, my weekend starts on a Thursday afternoon – or so I like to imagine. Really, it starts on Friday, as I don’t have to go into work. So my typical Friday morning looks like this:

Get up between 7am and 8am

Put on old clothes, strip bed, remake bed with new sheets and tidy bedroom.

Spray bathroom with spray and wipe

Move to kitchen/family room – tidy and use excessive spray and wipe. Clean out cats litter box and put all rubbish in big purple plastic container to take out to incinerator.

Go back to bedroom with vacuum and move through house with it (using it of course, not just carrying it)

Get big purple plastic container – remember to empty bathroom bin – go to incinerator and after many attempts light it.

Fill up bucket, search for mop, and mop kitchen/family room.

Throw water over the driveway, NOT down drain (septic tank problem!!)

Refill bucket with hot water and Handy Andy – clean bathroom (including shower, must remember the shower).

Throw water over the plants in garden that I want to kill!!

At anytime in the day I should also hang washing/fold washing/feed & clean chicken house/clean out dog kennels/mow lawns/weed gardens/ do baking.

So that is Friday in a nutshell. I turn into Sadie the cleaning lady. BUT … last Friday (27^th) was different as I had to go to school for a PD meeting, by 8.30am. Now, I hate having my Friday routine mucked up, hate it with a vengeance. I have a set order of doing things, in a set way. Exactly 11.23am will find the floors wet, 1.17pm will find the cake in the over – if you get my drift. So this meant Thursday night I was running around like a headless chook trying to get as much housework done before the clock struck 12 and I turned into a pumpkin.

Needless to say, that put DH in an extremely cheerful mood (not) as I was being loud and making noise while he was trying to watch tele. ‘Just do it tomorrow’ – well, I can’t, I have to go to school!! I’m trying to be nice to you here and get the house clean. Like, you’d think you’d appreciate that, like, I don’t know, like I’m doing a good thing!!!!!!!!

Anyway, got most of it done – minus the shower and incinerating and mopping, so at least house was tidy when I left at 7.55am for an 8.30am meeting (takes me 30 minutes to get to work).

NEXT RANT …

Somebody had changed the start of the meeting from 8.30am to 9am, AND they hadn’t told me!!! That is a whole half hour peoples!!!! I could have cleaned the shower, incinerated the rubbish and mopped my floors in that time!! Instead I got to sit at school, wondering where the H$#L everyone was. Then, oh wait, you’re going to love this, someone changed the end time of the meeting from 11.30am to 12 midday. We had a wedding to attend at 1pm, and I had to drive home first and then back into town with DH. That’s an hour’s travel people, leaving about 15 minutes to get changed into the glad rags and do the face. So needless to say I wasn’t a very happy camper.

On the positive side, we did get out of there at 11.35 (nobody had anything else to say), and DH wasn’t home when I rung, which meant I just stayed in town and went to the service by myself (Note: never do that again, really no fun) before zooming home to help him so we could get to the reception on time.

Ok. RANT over. The wedding reception was fine. The bride was beautiful, the groom was handsome, the food was hot, the company at our table was brilliant. Spent the night drinking juice and a wonderful chardonnay and having the giggles with one of my oldest friends about stuff our DH’s just didn’t get.

Next day to recount: Saturday 28^th October.

Woke up with a slight hangover. Very slight, but compounded with DH’s cold that he was just getting over, having handed it on to me, I felt like, well, something better at the bottem of a toilet.

Did the necessary hanging out of washing and loading the dishwasher before crawling back into bed.

Crawled out of bed and onto the couch over lunchtime. Ate a nutella sandwhich.

Crawled back into bed attaching towel to my pillow so I wouldn’t go through three boxes of tissues.

Realised phone was ringing. Little sister (long story, not by blood but by friendship) came over and we sat on couch while I blew my nose continually and she vented about parents/school and life.

DH came in from jobs on the farm and suggested we go to town and get videos. Yeah!! Finally a great idea! Got out ‘The Break-up’ which was meant to be a comedy. DO NOT WATCH THIS FILM IF YOU WANT A SATISFIYING ENDING. It does not have one – in my opinion anyway.

Watched Fear Factor Halloween special. Said bye to DH as he went out spotlighting with a whole bunch of people.

Crawled back into bed, half waking up when DH came in at midnight.

That was Saturday. In bullet points.

Oh, Sunday. This was a nice day. My cold had receeded, still a little sniffly, but not enough to moan about, which was good for everyone involved. Visited friends for lunch, before coming home. Had nice snuggles on the couch while watching a DVD, then a wonderful afternoon nap, before a cosy dinner and early night. I won’t expound the wonderful afternoon nap. I don’t think I’ll be getting any more of them this week – DH has decided he’s taking “a week off” – good timing honey, just when I’m meant to be ovulating. Yeah right you’re taking the week off. But then again, I’m NOT turning into the red-eyed monster this month, so maybe this is meant to be teaching me a lesson. I’ve got a really neat poem that I read yesterday that relates to this lesson teaching thing. I’ll post it as soon as I’ve found it again. And not getting pregnant this month but later would mean a nice spring baby, so I could deal with that. (Someone take a note of that and remind me of it in three weeks time when I’m screaming/yelling/crying about not being pregnant J )